CW: Fatphobia, body image issues,
Anyone who (like me) has spent a considerable amount of time on Twitter or TikTok in the past few months will be at least a little familiar with the concept of hot girl summer - the idea that as COVID restrictions end this summer it’s time to let loose and live your best life. Of course, much of the discussion has centred around women, their sexual liberation, and the celebration of all body types as beautiful. This is only right, as women continue to face unrealistic “summer body” expectations and have their sexuality constantly stigmatised.
However, none of that means that there’s no space for a hot boy summer as well. By this I don’t mean anything like the kind of lad-culture fueled, mostly futile, efforts at pick-up artistry that might immediately come to mind. Rather, this summer is a good opportunity for more young men to embrace their own bodies, their own sexualities, and have a go at breaking free from the patriarchal norms that are so rigidly imposed on most of us. Media like Love Island and Too Hot to Handle have returned in 2021 - once again equipped with a cast of ripped straight guys that do very little to reflect the vast majority of men. The point of this blog is to push back against the presentation of these individuals as the “ideal man”.
The first thing that bears mentioning is that there is no ideal man! If you ask 100 people what makes the perfect man you’ll undoubtedly get 100 different answers. It’s for this exact reason that I’m encouraging anyone reading this to focus on nothing except being the person they want to be.
The past year and a half have been tough on everyone’s mental health, but as we move out of the pandemic we have a real opportunity to start centering our own well-being. The easiest way men can do that is to start changing the way we think about our masculinity. If you’re a guy taking the time to read an IHH blog post, it’s safe to assume that you’re not likely to consider anyone less of a man for their sexuality, their body type, or how they choose to express themselves; it’s time to start applying the same logic to yourself! If you feel more comfortable being a few KG over what an arbitrary BMI score tells you is perfect, or don’t enjoy working out and are on the naturally skinny side - you don’t need to spend hours in the gym! No one worth having in your life is going to judge you for it.
Summer 2021 is the time to start accepting and enjoying the way you look. If you’ve always wanted to try expressing yourself differently - whether that’s a new haircut, wearing makeup, or trying out a crop top - there’s no better time to give it a go than this summer. We’ve all been inside for a long time and most people are too busy having fun to think about judging what others are doing.
I’m aware that taking the plunge and embracing who you are is far easier said than done, I personally still struggle with an internalised fatphobia that demands I lose weight in order to be attractive. But every time you look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are the man you want to be, life gets just a little easier. If we can all try to celebrate our appearances, express ourselves without fear of judgement, and embrace any non-conforming gender/sexual identities that we may have - summer 2021 will be a Hot Boy Summer after all.
---- Caleb Avis, Men’s Officer
